The Wisdom Weavers
Interlacing Ages and Insights
A wise person once said …
What surprises me most about humankind is that…
We rush through life stages, only to yearn for times gone by.
We chase wealth at the expense of health and are so future-focused that we miss the present.
We live as though immortal, yet depart having never truly lived.
Does it have to be this way?
The old saying – "every generation has to learn the stove is hot" – has always been ready on my mom’s lips when I fail or face a big challenge in life. I never like hearing it, as I deeply believe we should be clever enough learn from the burns of others.
In the machine learning AI age, learning vicariously from others is probably more critical than ever as the stakes are so high. Yet, there is still a gap between wisdom and knowledge and what it takes to embody something - to learn it by heart - so that you never forget it.
In a few weeks I will turn 50. And like most people that cross this threshold, it comes with lots of soul searching and inner revelation. My age is starting to shout be wise! But, there is a part of me still feels like a kid that just wants to play. I am like the little prince that doesn’t want to become King.
For me, this is linked to the decades I spent feeling deprived of key wisdom - the tall tales I wanted to hear from my grandparents I never met and the lacking advice from my father who died far too soon. These missing pieces of my life puzzle often left me feeling alone, vulnerable, and confused. But it didn’t need to be that way. I am not sure that any of my ancestors would have passed on any real wisdom to me in any case.
I am now trying to shift my focus to what I actually seek - knowledge and understanding from wise elders that are still alive! This, I believe, is something that we all need to make better sense of who and where we are in the tapestry of life.
Chat GPT helped me describe the qualities of a wise elder
“A wise elder is more than just an older individual; they are pillars of communities, acting as guides, mentors, and sources of invaluable insights gained through a lifetime of experiences.”
This has sparked an idea for a new project: The Wisdom Weavers, which is an effort to extend the healing of my ancestral wound beyond myself. Bringing wise elders more directly into our life experience offers so many benefits to everyone. It can help us all move towards the more beautiful world that our hearts know is possible.
An evening with a wise elders in the right atmosphere is a noble investment that requires no more effort than going out to dinner or watching a movie. It offers a chance to experience high quality time together across generations, without screens and masks, and to engage in something that is deeply human, meaningful, and perhaps even magical.
-
As a Gen-Xer, I bridge the past and future, nature and technology, man and machine. I feel my generation has a unique imprint of the more natural pre internet world and a responsibility to support and share the timeless wisdom of the wise elders still in service. Only they can make is realize how things were before things got so manic.
As a father witnessing my son enter into manhood, I now feel the weight of guiding the next generation more than ever. I know this responsibility is beyond me alone.
When navigating the complexities of the world, not having access to my elders has been difficult. But, it has also opened me up to a profound realization: the essence of our shared humanity lies in the stories we carry, the wisdom we inherit, and the future we shape with them.
In the pace and chaos of our digital age and decaying societal structures, Wisdom Weavers offers a much needed sanctum—a place to pause, absorb, and reconnect with the ageless wisdom that binds us all.
This is a noble and holistic intention that celebrates our elders while also amplifying the voices of the younger generations. This is a step towards ensuring a harmonious blend of the enduring and the contemporary in our lives. I will host facilitated discussions on line and in our own homes or spaces, as part of my life work.
Through Wisdom Weavers, I hope you will join in and contribute as you feel called. This way we can better support one another, honoring the age-old truth: it takes a village ….
Welcome!
Markus Lehto, co-founder Joint Idea, Life Works Labs, Love Mafia
Check out our first event below!
Wisdom Weavers
# 1 The Intricate Dance of Fathers & Sons
October 31, 2023 / 7-9 pm
Meet philosopher, LifeSmith, and elder Christopher Nevill,
an über experienced guide for the twists and turns of the masculine journey.
“I have an overflowing toolkit of life experience. People say that I draw out their hidden words and blind spots. It is not always pleasant, but it is effective.
Impressions on Christopher…
“Being with him is always profound and vitalizing chance to get a older perspective on what we think are new things”
“The thing with Christopher is that, you quickly realize you're not just in the presence of a teacher, but of a Master”
“The way he delivers knowledge is not traditional or politically correct. It's not just the words he speaks; it's his very essence that teaches”
“Instead of merely relaying information or techniques, Christopher cuts straight to the core, to the heart of any subject. So, you don't just learn; you understand.”
What will we discuss?
In an era where the essence of masculinity is frequently debated and open to question, this session seeks to unearth the foundational truths and values that have guided men for centuries. In our rapidly changing world,
What do we need to take forward from the past to forge stronger connections in the present and build a future where fathers and sons can communicate, connect, and grow with mutual respect and understanding like never before?
As matured men, what do we need to open ourselves to from the youthful energies of the future?
What do we have to learn to from our sons to regenerate ourselves and complete our life’s work?
These are only our some of our questions. What do you want to talk about? Let me know!
It will be a unique opportunity for much needed introspection, wisdom, and deep connection, while trying to better understand and celebrate the timeless dance we experience as fathers and sons.
Who should come?
Whether you're a father seeking to strengthen your bond with your son, a son yearning to understand your father better, or anyone interested in the dynamics of intergenerational relationships, this gathering promises insights that resonate deeply and universally.
While we encourage fathers and sons to attend together, individuals—whether fathers, sons, or others—are also welcome.
All we ask is for everyone to come with genuine intent to contribute meaningfully to the dialogue
How much will it cost?
The recommended contribution for this Wisdom Weavers session is $100*.
However, know times are tough and you are free to contribute what feels manageable for you. The aim is to pay it forward and support the weaving of wisdom and support to our remaining wise elders.
*You can pay by cash or credit card (credit card payments will be subject to 20% VAT). Ready to join in? Sign up here.
some further thoughts…
The general assumption underlying all initiatory rites is that unless a young male is shown real power through a community of wise elders, he will always seek false power and likely spend much of his life seeking prestige, perks, and possessions” Richard Rohr
The bond between a father and son is intricate and ancient, woven with threads of lessons, challenges, and silent promises.
We don’t often enough discuss the qualities and events that define being a man today or the milestones that mark a boy's transition to manhood. The lessons passed down from one generation to the next often go unspoken; instead, they are imprinted into us through conditioning and patterns, mostly sub or unconsciously. As Carl Jung reminded us, “until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”
In a practical sense, this has profound consequences for us, for our families, and for our world as a whole. Where we have not transformed our own conditioning, pain and suffering, we are destined to transmit it in some form. The results of this are well known though often forgotten...
we will become inflexible, blaming, and petty as we grow older
we will need other people to hate in order to expel our inner negativity
we will play the victim in some form as a means of false power
we will spend much of our life seeking security and status as a cover-up for lack of a substantial sense of self
we will pass on our deadness to our family, children, and friends.
we will remain locked in societies that are locked into our repeating patterns
Transcending this holding pattern is the work of generations, but for the men alive today that work to earn and thus perpetuate the manmade world, breaking the pattern starts with us. If we are ready to rise to the challenge, we should know that it will demand our full love, which is something we men need to reclaim without guilt, shame, or embarrassment.
In the realm of male relationships, a unique dynamic of 'tough love' often takes precedence. It's a love characterized by rigor and challenge, demanding one to rise and meet it. Many men, looking back, cherish memories of mentors who pushed them, coaches who demanded their best, and peers who wouldn’t let them settle. This tough love, if it is given without cruelty or humiliation, is respected and even sought after. It means being taken seriously, of being deemed worthy of that challenge.
This resonates differently to the traditionally celebrated idea of female love — that is beautifully nurturing, forgiving, and unconditional. It's the soothing embrace, the constant support, the love that says, 'You are enough, as you are.'
These two love paradigms are part of a whole, both valuable in their own right, but can sometimes clash in their understanding, expectations, and manifestations. In today’s woke society, the narrative surrounding male relationships is often overshadowed, misinterpreted, oversimplified, and even demonized.
But it's essential to recognize that for many men, love that doesn't challenge can feel less meaningful. It's not about devaluing unconditional love but understanding that, for many men, their self-worth is intricately tied to their challenges and their journey to overcome them.
For a man, love and respect that come without challenge or effort can inadvertently encourage manipulation over growth. There's a potency in working for acknowledgment, for being stretched beyond comfort zones. It's not about validation per se or love being difficult to earn, but rather about understanding that, for many men, the journey to earn it often enhances its value.
Thus, when we talk about male 'tough love,' it's a reflection of this journey, of this test of mettle. It’s a call to realize potential, to earn respect, and to grow stronger. It's about valuing the grit and resilience that such love fosters, even as we continue to cherish the warmth of unconditional acceptance.